According to the well-respected website Smart Marriages, the number one predictor of divorce for couples is “avoidance of conflict”. If you think about it, it makes sense. If a couple knows how to resolve conflicts, then they can solve just about any problem. If they don’t, then even the smallest problems build up.
Learning how to deal with conflict is one of the main things we do in couples therapy (another is healing old wounds that are causing trouble). It’s like any other skill. If you don’t know how to do it, it’s hard. Once you learn, and practice, and get good at it (all of which takes time), then it becomes second nature.
If you think that a successful marriage means never arguing, think again, and take a look at the article on the Smart Marriages website.